My Heart & Soul

This is the internet, which means it will never be deleted. But this is the truth.

I was raised by two parents who never gave a damn about me. They both separated when I was young; my dad showing more effection during my high school years & my mom who came around right before she passed. Yes, I’m lucky to have 2 parents. But the person I’m most grateful for is my grandmother, my abuelita.

This woman is my heart, my rock, my best friend, & everything and more. I couldn’t imagine my life without her at any point. She has supported me with more love & support than any one I have ever known. I’ve been so blessed with the years I’ve had with her, but seeing her recently has hurt me in ways I never thought imaginable. This woman is someone I cannot live without & the thought of it makes me sick. She’s my person, she’s my everything. Without her I am nothing. I ask anyone who sees this to please pray for us. If you have a person, imagine them and us being yours. I need her. Please just for a little while longer. Not now💛

“Who wants to love somebody like me?
You wanna love somebody like me?
If you could love somebody like me
You must be messed up too”

As weird as it may sound my biggest fear in life is that no one will ever love me. There is much of my past that many do not know. It’s going to take someone real special to love me

Put my guard down for 5 seconds & it fucks me like a pornstar

Society is constantly reminding us of what the true definition of beauty looks like. I by no means think I meet that expectation.

I don’t have a skinny waist, big hips, or nice breasts. I don’t have colored eyes, full lips, or nice cheek bones. I’m tan, big, and sometimes have good hair days.

But tell me why others feel the need to put someone down based on their appearance… One day someone will see me for the beauty I do have to offer. But until then please keep your negative comments to yourself.

Sincerely,
The girl with an already low self esteem